Bi-polar disorder, and depression are very common, and hard diseases to handle. They are hard for the sufferer, and they are hard for the person who has to handle them. Many people don’t realize it, but sometimes you shouldn’t just feel sorry for the victim, but also for the ones who have to handle the 0erson suffering from a disorder.
Now in no way does this mean that you should blame the victim. Unlike drug addiction Bi-polar disorder, and depression are a disease. However they cannot easily be cured without medication. Most people choose though at some point, and time to get off the medication for one reason, or another( mainly from believing the meds make them worse, or for dietary reasons), so even if they are currently on medication I would continue reading incase they decide to get off of it.
First Let’s Make Sure
How do you truly know that they’re suffering from Bi-polar disorder, or depression?
- Did a doctor say so?
- Are they too reclusive?
- Does it run in the family?
- Why do you believe they have a disorder?
I don’t suffer from Bi-Polar disorder, or depression, my dad does though. Again though I don’t, but he would often say things like “I have it so you do to”, or “Your obviously depressed, because you spend so much time alone, and you never invite friends home”. Let me get this straight: Yes, Bi-polar disorder Depression can be hereditary, but just because you have it doesn’t mean that your child, or grandchildren will have it.
Also you should find out if they’re depressed, or introverted. I’m an introvert, I prefer spending time alone. My dad took that as a “Sign of Depression”. An introvert will have the following characteristics.
- Spending time alone, instead of with friends, or family.
- Preferring animals over people.
- Being shy, and/or distant, etc.
A lot of people think that those signs also mean that your depressed, or that your bi-polar. No. Those are signs of an introvert, but also Yes, because those can be the signs of someone with depression. Introversion, and Depression do not go hand in hand though, as some believe. Maybe take your friend, or force your kid, or family member to see a therapist, and help define what exactly they have, because it can get confusing.
If you do want to try, and diagnose them yourself you can continue reading though, and get some pointers.
Bi-Polar Disorder Symptoms.
Very low lows, very high highs. Simply put: For a period of time (hours, days, weeks, or months) a person is very happy. They’re productive, and loving life. The world is just perfect… then they hit a speed bump. They then–after the period of happiness–go into a depressive state. This depressive state may involve anger, extreme sadness, and suicidal thoughts.
A consistent feeling of emptiness, sadness, loss of hope, and possibly suicidal thoughts. A depressed person may also be quick to anger, and have an odd sleeping schedule. Depression however can be temporary after things such as: Death, and other bad coincidences.
Now let’s start the article…
A lot of people are against medication, but if you know someone that has been diagnosed with Bi-polar disorder, depression, or both then try to get them on it. It greatly helps them become happier, and more active. Also The reasons some people choose to not use medication, aren’t for major medical purposes.
People aren’t afraid that they’re going to cut their lives short (Which they won’t), no! Most people who deny medication deny it because they believe it will make them overweight, that’s also the reason many people get off of the medication. If I has to decide between fitness, or happiness I would choose Happiness. Some may say “Well maybe being fit makes them happy”, but I wouldn’t think so because they have Bi-polar disorder, or depression and being fit currently isn’t making them happy.
The medication can help them, and help others. It may sound selfish saying “I want you to take this medication you object to just because it will make me happy”, but that’s not what we’re saying. A depressed person, or someone who suffers from Bi-Polar disorder isn’t going to say “Hey I’m [Enter name here] I have depression”. Co-workers, and newly made friends may not know that they have Bi-polar disorder, and may cut-off relations during the depressive part of the disorder not knowing that they person cannot help it. And that’s certainly not good for someone with bi-polar disorder, or depression.
That’s why the medication will be able to help the sufferer socially. My dad cut back his meds, and it’s very obvious. I can handle it, but the people at his job don’t know that he has bi-polar disorder. He’s the boss, and when he’s in his depressive state, and he’s bitter, and ride people quit. They believe that he may just be that way the whole time, and don’t want to deal with it. If he went back on his regular dose then he would probably not be having the roating wheel of employees he has now, he would be happier, and kinder throughout the day.
2. Walking On Eggshells
Every single person who has a spouse, friend, relative, or child who is Bi-polar, and/or depressive then they know all about walking on Eggshells. For a Bi-polar person during the depressive state you have to be very careful not to upset, or anger them, and the same goes for people with depression full-time.
You may have to filter your words, and how you say them. What they find funny one day, they may find horrible the next. One day you can mess around with them(Like, playing a joke on them), but if you do the same thing a week later they may get mad, and scream at you.
Its like they’re a macroscopic water balloon, and when you speak needles come out. One day a needle may not hit, the next it may. You may intentionally aim for the balloon, you may accidentally hit it.
The best thing to do to keep the person happy, is to walk on those eggshells. Or dodge them. Whatever. Just walk on eggshells during a high point of their depressive state, and eventually later in the day it will die down. Dying down does mean it will go away though, remember a bi-polar depressive state can last months, and depression can be permanent.
When my dads in a low-swing state of Bi-polarness we go on a drive, and I ask him what’s wrong. He will usually tell me, and like most bi-polar, and depressed people he will blame me for something. Bi-Polar, and depressed people will blame other people very often, and if they do get mad, and yell, and scream, or get physically violent they will either do one of two things: A. They will apologize, promise to never do it again, all that stuff, or B. Deny it ever happened.
I gave you that advice because while talking they are likely to blame someone, and if it’s you they may get violent, where its yelling, or physically violent(Remember that no matter how bad a disease is, if the person begins to harm you call the police. In those cases the best option may be to have them temporarily institutionalized.).
That’s why during these talks you especially need to walk on Eggshells, and run every single thing you say in your mind before you say it, and say it in the best possible way. One misstep can lead to them screaming, and yelling at you, i highly suggest not yelling back.
NOTE: If they get physically violent only fight back if neccessary, though for legal, and other reasons just try running away. If they are showing signs of getting physically violent then leave, and quite possibly call the police.
4. Sympathy And Staying Strong
Many people don’t want Sympathy. Many people do want Sympathy. And many people give way to much sympathy. You need to give not to much, not to little.
You want to encourage Bi-polar, and depressed people to stay strong, and not give in.
Someone with Bi-polar disorder, or depression may turn to drugs. This is an instance where you don’t want to give too much Sympathy, but you do want to encourage them to stay strong. Giving to much Sympathy will probably just make them go back to drugs because they weren’t punished enough before.
Going to church, and praying can help. A person with Bi-Polar disorder, or depression may find comfort in God, and Prayer. God also may help them recover, or deal better with the symptoms.